Steve Gooch - Playwright Dramatist Author Writer Editor

Star Turns: Script Excerpt

Based on the Elizabethan classic by John Lyly, brother to the Astronomer Royal. Three women in the suburbs take advantage of their menfolk being away on a footballing weekend to indulge in some girlie speculation about astrology. Who, according to the stars, would make the perfect man? Not Doug, surely?

Star Turns by Steve Gooch poster

Elaine: Surely there must be one.

Linda: I wouldn't count on it.

Bren: No chance, lovey, they're all bastards.

Elaine: Surely not all of 'em, Bren? Every single one?

Bren: In my experience.

Linda: And if anyone's got experience ...

Bren: Yeh yeh, more men than you've had ... silken hair tones.

Linda: Just a glutton for punishment, right?

Elaine: But look Bren, twelve different signs, all the different aspects. Are you saying there isn't one decent man in there somewhere?

Bren: Linda, I thought this was just for decoration?

Linda: It is. It's Elaine who's the believer.

Bren: You can't fool me. You're on the slide, aren't you.

Linda: The slide?

Bren: The slide into mysticism and superstition. It's a sign of the times. It's dog eat dog out there, so you retreat nto mumbo-jumbo in here.

Elaine: You're the one who's irrational. Not one decent bloke anywhere?

Bren: Not in the real world, Elaine. Not by definition.

Elaine: How can you say that?

Linda: Easy. She just opens her mouth.

back to playscripts